Throughout the year of planning, whether you realize it or not, you ask a lot of your friends and family members.  You ask them for their time while joining you on appointments, you ask them for their energy, you ask them for their money in the form of gifts and traveling etc and you ask them for an ear to listen to as you discuss, vent or decide on vital details of the day.  Your friends and family offer you their time and energy because they love you and support you, but that doesn’t mean that a simple thank you once and awhile isn’t important!

Don’t let thank you notes pile up. After each shower, bachelorette party or wedding gift comes in – make a point to get a thank you card out within two weeks.  Trust me, your family will notice if they don’t receive a thank you note! Since there are so many online registries, and gifts are ordered and shipped without even going in the store, many friends might wonder if you even got the gift if they do not receive a thank you.

Take a moment at the rehearsal dinner to stand up and say thank you.  The group at the rehearsal is usually those who have been working the closest with the wedding and giving you most of their energy in one form or another – so give a quick speech.  Use specific names and say how they helped you!

Show your gratitude… in the chaos of the year… always say Thank You!!

Despite wedding dress trends constantly changing, most brides keep their dress with thoughts of one day her daughter wearing the dress down the aisle.  Is this a realistic dream?

I do think it is unique and fabulous when a bride has the same style as her mother and is able to fit the dress to her body shape.  This will not only save you money but there is great history around your dress—unique to only your family.  If your mother has saved her dress this long, I am sure it will make her proud to see you wearing her dress on your big day.

I think this is a detail that depends on the personality of the bride and her picture of her big day.  I think that some brides want a brand new dress that they will be the only one to ever wear.  Other brides enjoy vintage dresses or are able to get great deals on resold dresses.

You want to feel 100% comfortable and gorgeous on your big day, I would hate for a bride to wear her mother’s dress because she feels it will make her mother happy.  Today is not about making your mother happy, it is about creating an event that reflects you and your future husband.

My suggestion is to possibly compromise with your mother.  Take her dress to a seamstress and if your mom is willing to let you alter it, change it to a more modern style.  Possible make it strapless or add some beading to make it a dress you originally envisioned.

If you are using your mother’s wedding dress, here are a few considerations from Weddingbells Blog:

Dresses condition
Review the overall state of the dress. Is the fabric strong enough to be handled without the gown literally falling apart at the seams? If it’s too fragile to withstand handling, you can always use the design as inspiration for a new custom-made gown. Or incorporate elements of the original—some lace details or the bodice—into a new garment.

Dress Size
Does the dress fit you? Does it even come close to fitting your body shape? This will determine how much work needs to be done on the gown. If it’s too small, the job only gets bigger as fabrics that form an exact match must be found in order to redesign it. Remember, the bigger the job, the bigger the final bill.

Find a Great Designer
Do your research before hiring a designer. Don’t pick the first one you see in the Yellow Pages. Make appointments, meet with each individual, show them your gown and look at their portfolio. Only when you find the perfect match should you commit to having the project done.

Good Luck and Happy Altering!

It is never too early to start compiling a list of what you are going to want your little girl to know when she begins to plan her dream wedding. Whether you are engaged, newlyweds or already have kids you all have had experiences that help you compile your life book of lessons.

I want to hear about all of the lessons learned while you were (or are) planning your wedding.  I asked my Twitter Favorites: “As a mother (or father) what would be the most important tips or advice you would want your daughter to know.” Check out the great ideas we have so far!

Hire great vendors, make the event reflect their personalities,keep guests comfy and let someone else sweat the small stuff. – @coutureplanner

If you don’t click with your photographer at first meeting, walk away–no matter how much you like the photos. – @kevinswancom

Dad still knows best, and even though you’re going to be married, you’re never too old to come to dad for advice.. oh and there better be an open bar at the reception (i’m paying for it after all). – @TheManRegistry

I would want her to know-her day should be about her couple and about having fun and of course about the wishpot wedding registry  - @gfit_girl

Not to get caught up in the drama. It’s about your love and commitment to each other. Stay true to what your vision is. It’s one day!  - @LazyBride

I’d remind her the Wedding is way less important than the Marriage- marry the right guy & work on the relationship. Wedding is secondary. – @keepingfeet

Make the day her own – Personalize the wedding with touches that reflect her and the groom’s interests, likes, and style. The smallest, personalized details can be what the couple and guests remember the most about the wedding.  A signature drink, unique wedding favors guests can use after the wedding, whimsical cakes placed on guest tables or a fun ice cream bar at the reception can create special memories of the wedding for her and her guests.

Hire wedding professionals – Let them work their magic and guide her and her groom in creating a vision for their wedding. By leaving the details of coordinating, planning, and taking care of all the behind the scenes details of their wedding, she will be able to reduce her stress and focus on enjoying one of the biggest celebrations of her life.

Take planning breaks – Enjoy the engagement! It’s a very special time in a couple’s life. Don’t let it be overshadowed by the stress of planning the wedding. Make sure she and her fiancé take the time to enjoy non wedding activities. As exciting as planning a wedding can be, her fiancé probably doesn’t want to talk about it nonstop.

Remember the significance of her wedding day – More important than any detail big or small is the fact that her and her husband are leaving their past behind them and starting a new life together. They are pledging their love for each other in front of family and friends. If hurricane force winds are blowing on the day of the wedding or the wrong cake was delivered, while it would be disappointing, she can’t let it overshadow the meaning their special day  – @ElegantFavors

If my daughter is as beautiful as my wife on her wedding day it won’t matter where she plans it, what the flowers look like of who the photographer is.. it will be perfect. – @jjeaton

Many thanks to everyone who participated…Leave comments with your advice and lessons learned!

If you think planning one wedding is stressful, imagine planning and executing three weddings within 24 months of each other!  A good friend of mine is blessed with four girls in her family, three of which have found the men of their dreams and are all walking down the aisle within a very short time of each other.  When you are marrying off three daughters, it truly becomes a job. Your free time is filled with flowers, dresses and photographers.  To add some humor to their situation, they created business cards for their dad, stating his new profession, Father of the Bride.

Each card has a cute new saying on the back and crosses out one more “bride”.  I especially love how much thought was put into these…even a small detail such as the website on the card is different.  It starts out as poorhouse.com…changes to poorerhouse.com…and the third one is listed as flatbroke.com.  I cant wait until their youngest gets married and creates the final business card.

This is such a unique way to poke fun at the “wedding business” they have at their home.  You can tell this family has fun together and the father is proud of his daughters as they walk down the aisle!  I love to see families find their own ways of overcoming the stresses of weddings and joining together to simply have fun and celebrate the new marriages being formed.

How did your family add humor in your day with the details?

Every father of the bride begins planning his speech after his daughter says “I will”.  He has the length of the engagement to figure out just what to say to charm the crowd while giving his daughter away and holding back any tears that may be creeping up.

Quick Outline For the Father of the Bride:

* Always begin with an introduction of who you are (even though 75% of the people will already know).  Let them know you are the proud father of the bride and how long you have known the groom.

* Welcome everyone to the celebration and thank them for joining your family.  I always think it is nice to specifically mention certain guests who came the furthest to join.  It also helps make it more personal and let everyone at the wedding feel they are involved.

* Sharing a personal story—especially if it is funny—will be appreciated by the guests.  As a dad you have probably been involved in more day-to-day moments with the bride and groom and sharing that with family who came from afar will help catch everyone up.

* Depending on what type of venue you are at, it helps to clear up some administrative issues such as where the bar/bathrooms/guestbook are, or any other special items you may have at your reception are located!

* Thank everyone again and end with a cheers to the bride and groom!

Thank the People who Have Helped Along the Way:

* The pastor for holding such a beautiful ceremony, and if you know them personally maybe mention how long you have known them and why it is so important that they are marrying your daughter.

* The mothers of the bride and groom for their help in organizing the wedding.

* The bridal party who has shared so many memories and supported both the bride and groom along the way.

* Every friend and family member who has in some way made an impact in the two lives and helping them become who they are today.  Thank them for traveling to the event and giving up their time to spend the evening in celebration.

While you are writing your speech, here are a few suggestions of what you can fill in with:

*Let the crowd know your relationship over the years with your daughter, and let it reflect in your speech.  Tease/poke fun or add in some special jokes just for your daughter.

* Speak from your heart, avoid using other people’s words, only you can explain your feelings and thoughts.

* Tell any stories you remember from when she was a kid and dressed up in her mother’s wedding dress or would talk about her princess wedding.

* Talk about your first impressions of her new husband when she first brought him home.

* Mention the future and how it looks bright, let her know how proud you are about how far she has come and now with her new husband supporting her she has so many opportunities ahead.

* Point out what you have learned from your new son-in-law and daughter’s relationship.

* Of course, bring up how happy your daughter is now, and has been while dating her new husband.

* Offer advice that your mother and father left you with or might have toasted to at your wedding.

* Welcome the groom into the family, mention how excited you are to join the two families together.

* Always raise your glass at the end and toast to the new marriage, and to the memories created today and many memories left to be created.

** What are ideas that you have for the Father of the Bride to discuss during his speech? **